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How to Improve Your Self-Esteem

Nothing matters more than how you feel about and think of yourself.

A good opinion of ourselves — who we are, what we do, and essentially loving ourselves — is something most of us lack.

Why is building and maintaining high self-esteem so important? Because life becomes simpler. When you love yourself, things become easier and simpler.

You'll stop building sandcastles. You won't drag yourself down over simple mistakes, or for failing to reach some impossible, inhuman standard. You'll have greater inner stability.

Below are some important tips and habits that will help improve your self-esteem, even during the difficult periods of your life.

1. Say "Stop" to Harsh Self-Criticism

A good place to start is learning how to manage and replace the voice of your inner critic. We all have that inner voice pushing us to do things to earn the acceptance of people around us — yet it will also drag your self-esteem down at the same time.

There are ways to minimise this critical voice and replace it with more helpful thoughts. You can create a stop word or a phrase to interrupt it, then redirect your thoughts to something more constructive.

2. Use Healthier Motivations

Having healthy motivations makes your inner critic less useful to you, and that voice weaker. Remind yourself of the benefits of high self-esteem by writing down the deeply felt benefits you'll gain by following this new path or achieving a particular goal.

Once your list is complete, put it somewhere you'll see it every day. If you ever lose your motivation, ask yourself: "Am I doing what I actually want to do?"

3. Take 2-Minute Self-Esteem Breaks

If you dedicate just two minutes a day for a month, it can make a huge difference. Take a deep breath, slow down, and ask yourself: what are the 3 things I can appreciate about myself?

These short breaks don't just build self-esteem long-term — they can also turn around a negative mood and recharge you with plenty of positive energy.

4. Write Down 3 Things You Appreciate About Yourself Each Evening

This is a variation on the habit above. Write your answers in a journal or on your computer/smartphone. After a few weeks, you can read back through all your answers to stay positive.

5. Do the Right Thing

When you do what you deeply believe is right, you build and reinforce your self-esteem. One tip that makes it easier to stay consistent is trying to do a few such actions early in the day.

6. Replace Perfectionism

Few habits of mind are as damaging to daily life as perfectionism. How can you overcome it? Aim for "good enough". Aiming for perfection usually results in a project that never gets finished.

7. Handle Mistakes and Failures More Positively

When you stumble, become your own best friend. Instead of beating yourself up, ask: how would a friend or my parent support and help me in this situation? Ask yourself: what can I learn from this?

8. Be Kind to Other People

When you're kind to others, you tend to treat and think of yourself more kindly too. The way you behave toward other people is, over time, the way they tend to behave toward you.

9. Try Something New

When you try something new, when you challenge yourself even a little and step outside your comfort zone, your opinion of yourself rises.

10. Stop Falling Into the Comparison Trap

When you compare your life, yourself, and what you have to other people's lives, you're holding a destructive habit in your hands. Replace it with something better: compare yourself to yourself.

11. Spend More Time With Supportive People

It will be hard to keep your self-esteem high if the most significant influences in your life are dragging it down. Spend more time with positive, uplifting people.

12. Remember Your "Whys" for High Self-Esteem

Remind yourself of the most important reasons you want to work on your self-esteem. Keeping these compelling reasons in mind can work wonders.

Dimitris Drivakos

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